Ok- I’m old enough to remember the first ever generation of Star Trek on TV…..but although I am now knocking on a bit in years……I don’t remember the opening dialogue as…….
“Space……..The final frontier……..These are the proposed voyages of the Sovereign State of Ukraine……..It’s 3 year mission……To throw into orbit a few satellites, to seek out no new life and no new civilizations……To boldly go where every f*cking man and his dog have been already!!!!”
Well, what can I say. I like the fact Ukraine as a nation is looking past the current financial crisis and spending $2,000,000,000 on their space programme between now and 2011……well, I would like it, if Ukraine was not borrowing $16.5,000,000,000 from the IMF a few extra $000,000,000′s from the World Bank, even more $000,000,000′s from the EU……or EBRD to be exact, have been given $50,000,000 by UEFA to help in readiness for the 2012 football tournament, $5,000,000,000 from Russia and a lot more $000,000,000′s from bilateral agreements with other nations as well.
What’s $2,000,000,000 out of all of this?………Well not much really…….until you consider that pensions have been frozen, wages have not been paid and “promissory notes” are being given to some staff who still have jobs, underpaid police, teachers, doctors, nurses dentists do nothing to combat corruption in order to make up enough money to have something that approaches a decent living standard etc etc.
That is not to mention that the combined amount of personal wealth stolen from Ukraine in dubious business deals, acquisitions and outright theft from the Sovereign State of Ukraine by the political elite and untouchable business leaders totals more than the IMF loan………but that’s another story!!!!
Anyways……buoyed by all this money being donated to keep Ukraine afloat, the decision has been made to pull back the elastic band at several Ukrainian space launch sites in 2009 and try and get enough tension and potential energy in them, that upon release, this energy will turn from potential energy into kinetic energy with sufficient force to “lob” two Ukrainian Sich 2 spacecraft into orbit before the end of 2009………although to what end……who knows…..maybe with the end of tax havens and transparent accounting on the horizon that’s where the oligarchy have decided to hide their illicit funds!!
More useful, is the planned launch of satellites in 2011……..by which time, hopefully Ukraine will not only being paying Russia it’s gas bill, like any other consumer, but they will also have started repaying some of the monumental international debts it is now racking up……as these satellites actually have a purpose which I can see some rationale behind.
What?……..Common sense in Ukraine?……..F*ck me, they’ll be wanting to join the EU next!!!!
No, it’s true……..the intended purpose of the satellites is to monitor crops and agriculture, which is vital for Ukraine, and natural disasters….”amongst other things” according to the official press release.
Eh?……..The Russians won’t like it?……..Ah, don’t worry……this is being done in conjunction with the Russian Space Agency as also announced in the official press release.
So there you have it…….by the end of the year there will be 2 converted Lada’s orbiting the earth under the control of Ukraine…………Yes, you’re right, it is to be hoped the do “drive” the Sich 2′s better than they drive in Ukraine but to be fair……there is more debris in space than there is on the roads of Ukraine after more than 50 years of international space agencies “fly tipping” in the atmosphere.
You know it’s getting crowed up there when old Russian satellites are bumping into American spacecraft, both China and America are “blowing up” satellites in orbit and sending debris flying around at 17,000 miles an hour………all in the past 3 years.
What are the chances of the $50 Million D&G handbag, containing sonic screwdriver, phaser set at stun and reserve pack of dilithium crystals, lost by some silly cow in space a few months ago, downing the Ukrainian Sich 2′s or satellites?
Anyway, Ukraine is to once again enter “Space”…………oh yes they have been there before when part of the USSR so at least the 2 orbiting Lada’s later this year will be without “L” plates!!!